Sarcastic One Liners to make your day!

Exactly!

Single life is all about picking up phone, unlocking it & seeing your disappointed face along with time & locking it again. #helloseptember

— Sarcasm (@sarcastic_us) 1 September 2017

Everyone.

The thing I miss the most about being a kid is it being acceptable to yell at everyone when I'm tired.

— Sarcasm (@sarcastic_us) 20 August 2017

Seriously!

You can win over the whole world but can't argue with that person who has those ugly pics of you which can ruin your career.

— Sarcasm (@sarcastic_us) 28 July 2017

Truth!

The more you realize the world is full of assholes, the closer you're to the truth.

— Sarcasm (@sarcastic_us) 20 July 2017

Oh man dying at this one!

Never hold in a fart
.
.
.
that's something an asshole would do

— Sarcasm (@sarcastic_us) 10 April 2017

Haha!

I dont always buy clothes , but when i do
its out fashioned and 70 % off.

— Sarcasm (@sarcastic_us) 23 February 2017

Every time! -_-

I hate it when I open a book and a cell phone jumps into my hand and I ignore the book for next 6 months.

— Sarcasm (@sarcastic_us) 10 February 2017

Lazy bum!

I have stopped hurrying to get to someplace when I am getting late.
I have accepted the fact that I will always be late.

— Sarcasm (@sarcastic_us) 31 January 2017

Never thought about it!

A scuba diver is the only job where you are appreciated for reaching a new low.

— Sarcasm (@sarcastic_us) 16 January 2017

Already drowsy!

Waking up early for attendance in lectures only to later sleep in lectures.

— Sarcasm (@sarcastic_us) 16 January 2017

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