The one liners from this twitter handle will make your day!

Salad, anyone?

salad tastes pretty good once you add some pizza and get rid of the salad

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 12 October 2017

Yeah!

why send one big text when you can send 15 little ones in a row & be even more annoying

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 30 September 2017

-_-

list of things im handling well currently

1.

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 18 September 2017

Pun!

I’m a social vegan. I avoid meet.

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 3 September 2017

Yup!

later is the best time to do anything

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 2 September 2017

Oops!

my head is hurting because i thought about my future for 0.3 seconds

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 31 August 2017

That was unexpected!

u may think im a horrible person but deep deep down im even worse

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 27 August 2017

Awesome!

im buysexual, you buy me food, i become sexual

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 26 August 2017

That would have solved everything!

why cant i cry money instead of tears

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 11 August 2017

Yeah!

"you know what part i love about waking up?

none of it. let me sleep"

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 27 July 2017

Mine too!

im naturally funny cause my whole life is a joke

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 7 June 2017

Of Course!

i like my bed more than i like most people

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 18 May 2017

Wish!

can i unfollow my problems

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 8 March 2017

Point!

the thicker ur thighs the more snacks you can lay on your lap

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 17 July 2017

Twist!

i'm great in bed... i can sleep for hours.

— pakalu papito (@pakalupapito) 14 July 2017