THESE SARCASTIC ONE LINERS WILL GIVE COMEDY SCRIPT WRITERS A RUN FOR THEIR MONEY! (PART 8)

• Every year you pass your birthday and know that you were born that day, but every year you pass your death day and have no clue.

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• Pregnancy is like a group project where one person gets stuck with all the work.

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• Cells divide to multiply.

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• Being born poor is like starting the game on hard mode. Being born rich is like playing easy with tutorial enabled.

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• What if your dog just walked up to you one day and said “nobody will ever believe you” and then never spoke again.

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• No one deals with rejection more than Internet Explorer requesting to be your default browser.

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• The only thing I am serious about in my life is making sure that I wear the right earphone on right ear and left one on my left.

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• I hate it when kids scream in public! You have no REAL problems. It should be me screaming!

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• To get a loan, you need to prove that you don’t need a loan.

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• Japan during WWII: what're your super powers again?

        Nazi Germany: I'm Reich.

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via @SarcasmMother

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