THESE SARCASTIC ONE LINERS WILL GIVE COMEDY SCRIPT WRITERS A RUN FOR THEIR MONEY! (PART 11)

• All milk is breast milk.

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• Anxiety is actually your brain coming up with Fake News.

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• Attractive doctors and nurses probably never get accurate pulse readings from their patients.

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• At the end of the day, life should ask us, ‘Do you want to save the changes?’

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• We dream of making Mars more like Earth, while we continue to make Earth more like Mars.

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• Frames per second is just resolution for the 4th dimension.

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• In order to be popular on Instagram, normal people have to appear like celebrities, and celebrities have to appear like normal people.

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• An illegal immigrant has never taken or stolen anyone’s job. Those jobs are given to them by your fellow countrymen.

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• There's a parallel universe where fictional characters are real & real people are fictional & your favorite character runs a blog about you.

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• If you get a bigger bed, you have more bed room but lesser bedroom.

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via @SarcasmMother

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